Hello all my beautiful, possibly wickedly twisted friends. And everybody that likes puppies and rainbows. If that’s your thing. Whatever floats your boat, and right now we’re here to talk about one of my favorite things. Getting off. Not that hard a concept I know, and for those arses who’d say ‘that’s what she said,’ I’ll remind, a Wolf has a knot. I’ve never yet heard complains… Let’s get into the good stuff, between the blackest silken sheets.


First, what is dominance? Some refer to it as a state of power. That power in a supernatural game can be outright unstop-ability. Raw strength or endurance. Healing ability. In the animal sense it’s a certain set magnetism. A presence, and an aura of command. Can you learn this? I would argue… not really. However, it’s not a straightforward no. Or exactly an outright yes. The thing is a person who has any inclination to control an outcome, has a vein where they will seek to be dominant. This aspect too often these days gets demonized, and frankly taken far out of context.

Any true dominant, knows their own power. They will constantly test it. They will enforce it. Note, we’re going to get to how I mean that. There are SO many things people get wrong about dominance. It is who, and what you are. A part of your core. It can be learned to a very fine point through endurance, and conscious choice. You can mimic the stances. BUT, at the end… the real meat of it is; it’s either in you to be dominant, or it’s not. Let’s break down what’s not…

BDSM – What Is The Difference?

Bondage. Dominance. Submission and (Sado)Maschoism. Only one is directly linked to what I’ve typed above. If you have to guess which it is; you’re doing it wrong. I get that a lot of anime focuses on some very interesting rope work. The ball gags, and the blindfolds can be common in a lot of the art as well. Treating your partner overly roughly, is more of an excuse, edged to hyper-extension from a need to vent frustrations. The key point here is simple. Control. IS. Paramount. For that matter, so is consent. Now most dominants, if they are actually dominant, will value control of themselves above all other aspects. For me, it’s a code. A true Dom will never try to control your dress, but they will value when you choose to dress a certain way, just for them. There is a difference.

Look at it this way Devs – a contract between a Dom, and their Sub, is binding. Usually verbally agreed on, and never a means to degrade either position’s power. The Sub gives that up freely. Because they gain their pleasure from providing service. It isn’t about pain for them. It’s not about enduring an asshole, or guilt and broken mindset because they think they “deserve this.” Tying your partner(s) up can be fun, but it should NEVER be considered necessary. If a Dom needs to chain your ass to the bed or “make” you behave, either they aren’t a true dominant, or you don’t really want to be a sub. Take your pick. While we’re at it, safe words only count against those who are willing to dip into the SM part. Which I’ll never recommend in a game.

Breaking It Down To The Base:

Spanking is fine. Most enjoy that. The “Daddy” Dom is a type, but I find it overused. It’s got it’s flavor of kink, and that’s alright for some. It’s not my taste (yes despite the fact I have a focus on pregnancy – you can find that odd all you want) Choking goes into SM, and for the purposes of games I would avoid it like a ten foot pole. Far too open to abuse. If you have to do a firm hold at the throat, go for the back. At the ruff, is more animal, and will spark a submissive’s instinct almost automatically. A dominant that can’t control what’s inside them, has already lost. One who’d abuse the bond, for sake of testing power at all, isn’t worth the honor of having a partner they can trust.

At the end, and the reason I started with the really heavy guns first: Trust is key. It’s a part of the trinity. Two people go into this bond with eyes wide, and hearts open. Without trust, it doesn’t work. It’s just abuse, couched. For myself, I could pin my girl down at the wrists, and be fine. I could never need more than looking into doe eyes, full of love and want as I take what’s mine. That’s who I am and how I’m built. The trappings are there, for people that want to play, but I find all the rules in the BDSM scene are more about stripping control away from the Dom. Taking the power and placing it with the sub, far too much. They already have the choice to give in, or not. There is no greater power to have.

End Result:

You will know at heart, if you are inclined to be a Dom. Or a sub. If you want to play games, you’re likely asking to get hurt. Metaphorically, or more likely not. Just remember, the sub is not the only one who can choose. If you want a mate who’s in control, and you tease too much; they are going to tell you to hit the damned road. One part I hate about basically all of these games is that almost all sex scenes are foreplay. It’s almost all teasing. Which is fine, but anticipation built, requires timely release. This is how you lose about every single one of your invested funders. The last thing to know is – be aware of whether you want to make a dominant character, and who they are.

From the start, know if you’re going to do a “turn the tables” and FOLLOW THROUGH. Again, as quickly as you can do. It’s a good job to assume the main character will be dominant. Or will try to position themselves into that power spot as soon as can be managed. Do NOT ever take that away. Fem Dom is not true dominance. It’s not about power. It’s about humiliation. Fem Dom is just bitter, and vicious. It’s never a freaking game. Some females will claim it’s their means to regain their power. It’s not. It’s the female variant of the “Dom.” Who invariably never knew how to be one. In other words; asshole. Pure and simple, call a spade a spade. Before she hits you with a club and tells you to like it bub.


Please… just, Jesus H. Jumping Blood of Christ; look the damned word up. I mean it. Now. Before you use it in your game (unless it’s banter and even then your character using it is being an ass to do so) understand the fact that porn has existed for hundreds if not thousands of years. It is common place now, and has been at varied points, to varied degrees. Looking at naked people is also not perverted. WANTING to look at naked people is not perverted. (Unless they’re hags, but that’s it’s own weird and ‘not as humorous as you think it is’ thing) The part that is less common about it is the sneaky aspect. Even then, given how often you can get caught, and how those people may not trust you for a while but can forgive it, NOT that “socially unacceptable” God.

So you’re aware, and you probably are but I’m going to go ahead and point out the glaringly obvious again; you are insulting the ever-living fuck out of your own audience when you use that word. Also, we don’t need scenes of the characters masturbating. We all know what we’re probably doing to and or with this media here. The fantasy is broken as far as immersion if the MC does the exact same thing the player is almost certainly doing in RL. It’s NOT a replacement for a sex scene. It’s a little easier to take when it’s the girls, but it’s still a massive tease, and mostly a waste of resources that could be better spent for how often you guys use it. You don’t use the word pervert for games with Futa/Trans MC’s or Furries… just saying. It’s very rarely used for females in general.

Pregnant?!? O . O

Seriously – what is the point of doing a dating sim that even talks about the possibility, and automatically she’ll bring up in the next sentence “I’m on birth control.” Or while you’re fucking, if you do actually get the option to pick “cum inside” she’ll freak out, even though in a lot of cases if it’s just the once (and let’s face it for most current games on the site, with each girl, it pretty much will be) it shouldn’t be the automatic end of the world scenario. Speaking of… If it’s that, and it’s a harem game, THAT should be your main freaking focus. Not a joke computer AI that’s pushing an eighteen year old to “get right on it.”

Point being, it’s there because it’s a known draw, so stop killing the power fantasy it actually is, and USE it. You wouldn’t even actually have to show the births – though I personally call it a cop out, and in the one game I’ve played that did the author felt the need to specifically point out that labor as it stood wasn’t meant to be a “sexualized” thing. Duh. sexualizing the act of labor isn’t why it’s erotic. Think about it… you took the time to build this bond with someone who valued you enough to want to create a little pod person like both of you. She’s struggling in the most primal sense, to gift the world that life you both value. It’s a point of connection nothing can take away. THAT’S what’s erotic.

18+ & Pregnant? Or No…

It really irks me that so many games don’t even give the player the ability to discuss the option. Sometimes they’ll outright discuss marriage before they have sex, or getting into an invested relationship beforehand almost invariably, but even if it’s genuinely an accident… no matter how much bs time you as the player invest in pursuit, she freaks. Why did I spend all that time investing in the chase if one little thing, like being a mom = got scared? Then again, this ain’t Philadelphia and most of you probably wouldn’t call me a prince. I damn sure don’t live in Bel Air. It doesn’t always equate realism in the relationship for the response to be outright panic to “you’re an asshole.”

Not every girl is going to react like that and here’s a secret: remove the threat in the 9 months of pain, the unavoidable (outside of expensive abortions which would be another issue except I’ve never seen a game cover it extensively) responsibility, and I guarantee a LOT of girls actually enjoy the feeling. Some even immensely. It’s a primal thing. It’s an automatic gold star on the “I did it well.” Which believe me, can stroke both egos on varied levels, and points. Deeply. To be straight, no one old enough to play these games thinks anyone programming them at all advocates for teen pregnancy. Or parental irresponsibility. We’re not all looking to be the guy that sires a fucking island worth of kids (Usually lol – maybe if I could get away with it, I’d admit it’s to my tastes)

BUT the idea she wants that, without a fight? That’s the “power” fantasy. In the sense of the power in feeling like we’re desirable. Like what we have to offer genetically, is desirable.

In Closing – Your Legs, To Avoid Pregnancy ; )

I’ll be upfront as to why it personally means so much to me. Share a little secret here. Just between you and me. I was born with mild mixed Cerebral Palsy. What that boils to is a brain injury at birth or near enough. It wasn’t nearly as bad as it could’ve been, but I’m stunted in some ways. I have scars and it affects my view of how people look at me. Now, it doesn’t do a fucking thing genetically. It was really bad luck, or a twist of fate. Either way. BUT, point being since I’m not a girl, it does significantly lower my chances of having that right one day. So for me; this is the key to my enjoyment of Harems. Of pregnancy.

It’s not a fetish, so much as an extension of a natural impulse that’s been heightened in me for very specific reasons. I will never call it a fetish for my own view. The point being, treat the event with the respect it deserves Devs. Since these games are all at least undercurrents of a power fantasy in some vein, put the option in full player control. It’s REALLY fucking sad that the ones I’ve seen do that so far, lean so damned heavily on incest as a trope.

Every 2nd Game – I Swear…

You all do know that incest isn’t that bloody common right? Hell, it’s popular, and considered “erotic” because it was taboo. Which literally meant it wasn’t that common, as it wasn’t seen to be a good thing. Now here’s the thing. Look up most laws. Cousin to Cousin; even firsts, is not considered incest. You can in many countries marry your first cousin legally. Including mine, and many states in the US. It is considered incest when it is a direct blood relation. Mom; Dad, Brother, Sister, Aunt, Uncle. All incest. Step family isn’t really as clever a way to avoid the issue as some media thinks.

Given what some media qualifies as acting though, I’m not expecting Hawking level awareness here. On the point of NTR which I will bring up in regard to the Step trope; it’s best done with the full control of the player involved. Or not at all. I don’t care how mid-life crisis you want the Dad, or how hot you want to make the Step-Mom who may be young enough in game not to have ever been a mom herself yet. If you’re going to go Neto… you do it to break the relationship. Poly is a very difficult point, and swinger is essentially not Poly.

Open Heart Vs. Always Open Legs:

Poly when it’s done well is the Harem game. Swinger is NTR that’s on the downswing. It can be slow. It probably should be; but it’s two people who aren’t right for each other anymore, or never were. Trying their best to slow the dissolving of something they aren’t QUITE ready to let go. In a more realistic turn, it’s because divorce is expensive and explaining shit to the kids is a bitch no matter which way you slice it. If you’re going to do NTR properly, see it through to the end, and let the MC characters on both sides find loves that fit. Or decide one night stands are all they want. That’s fine too, but the actual “swinging” part HAS RULES. Always. (Yes I’m talking of one specific game here, but others come very close with it)

There’s a reason Good Girl Gone Bad didn’t get too heavily involved with it – and despite my gripe about the one pregnant end given in the game so far – I’d actually commend the Dev for that. Couch it any way you like, it’s a style of life that is to many at least highly flawed. If not outright false. Btw, anyone that says they enjoy being cuckolded has their wires crossed, or IS lying. To themselves if nothing else. There’s a difference between knowing you can’t stop what’s being done/going to be done soon enough, and enjoying any part of it. Agreeing to save face, spare divorce, doesn’t meant it’s actually pleasant to experience. For me, it’s one of the reasons I’m very mixed on NTR.

Better To Quit With A Little Head:

I am okay when I’m the one in the sexual scene. Or if I get to control the wife’s choice… but it’s still not a kink I indulge often. Because I know if I ever did find someone who’d want to marry, I’m a ‘once in a lifetime’ kind. Unless I find a vampire; then all bets are off. In basically every “hot-wife” game, they always treat the husband like a cuckold right off. It’s insulting and the truth is often more than Fifty Shades of Grey between the lines. Nevermind the sheets. I don’t wanna know where those have been guys.

At any rate the key points to remember is: Never strip power from a dominant mind. Do not treat the MC like some weird ass for natural attraction, and then wonder why they won’t chase the female characters, or pick them apart. Pregnancy, and Marriage as concepts should be treated with due respect. I wasn’t even trying for puns with that one. I promise. It’s already difficult enough to know that as a dominant mind myself, in order to respect my potential mate’s rights, I have to ask to be allowed to show her my true self. Strip the mask, remove the blinds, and maybe we can show each other all for one, what we hold deep inside. Eat your heart out, Carl Jung. See you guys, maybe some time later tonight.